Dear Homo,

I'm gay, and I've recently come out of the closet. Some of my girl friends feel weird around me now, and I need some advice on what we should talk about.

HELP!!!

Luv,
Chuck

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Dear Chuck,

Congratulations on coming out! That's a pretty big step in a homo's life. As far as women go, whether friends or ex-lovers, just talk about anything and everything you used to talk about before you came out. I'm sure they'll have lots of questions for you. For example, "When did you know you were queer?" or my personal favorite, "How do you determine who sticks in it who's butt?"

Maybe you could break the ice with "Hey, now we all like the cock!" Or even something blunt like, "How do you curb the gag-reflex?" Girls tend to do better with blunt questions, not sure why, but they do. You might want to also think about going out one night and scoping out guys, to see how well they react to your newly found freedom.


Always Glad To Hook a Homo Up,
The Homo